83. Gender Language and How to Do Better with Abby Rolf

They/Them/Theirs 

 

Abby Rolf, mental health therapist specializing in transgender knowledgeable and inclusive care. 

 

Language is gendered 

 

https://www.healingvillagetherapy.com 

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/abbie-rolf-they-them-largo-fl/461019 

practicewithpronouns.com 

mypronouns.org 

  

  

Find me on all the socials!  

Instagram @erikamileytherapy  + @sextalkwitherikamiley
Twitter @MrsErikaMiley
Facebook.com/sextalkwitherikamiley
https://www.youtube.com/user/MrsErikaMiley
erikamiley.com 
erika@erikamiley.com  

If you like this episode and podcast, please consider leaving a rating and review on your favorite podcast app!

 

If you struggle with shame about your body, your sexuality, or need to process your personal life, I offer 1-on-1 Therapy. Click the button to the right for more info.

 

82. Sex Issues Across the World with Cyndi Darnell 

The world has issues around sex.  The issues are more common than you would think. Erika talks with Cyndi Darnell, international sex and relationship therapist.  Cyndi has moved from Australia to the United States and explored the commonalities and differences between the countries and issues with sex and relationships.  

How to find Cyndi: 

https://cyndidarnell.com 

https://cyndidarnell.com/online-sex-courses/ 

 

  

Find me on all the socials!  

Instagram @erikamileytherapy  + @sextalkwitherikamiley
Twitter @MrsErikaMiley
Facebook.com/sextalkwitherikamiley
https://www.youtube.com/user/MrsErikaMiley
erikamiley.com 
erika@erikamiley.com  

If you like this episode and podcast, please consider leaving a rating and review on your favorite podcast app!

 

If you struggle with shame about your body, your sexuality, or need to process your personal life, I offer 1-on-1 Therapy. Click the button to the right for more info.

 

81. ADHD After Dark with Dr. Ari Tuckman 

Often in relationships we are not talking about how mental health issues are impacting our sex lives and relationships.  In this episode Erika talks with Dr. Ari Tuckman, psychologist, author, certified sex therapist, and ADHD expert about how relationships are impacted by ADHD.   

 

What you will hear: 

How typical relationship issues are amped up by ADHD and how couples, or any other relationship configuration can manage it. 

What research has said about how sex is impacted or not by medication. 

Relationships have common issues that are not unique to ADHD! 

How to find Ari: 

Adultadhdbook.com 

Tuckmanpsych.com 

http://adultadhdbook.com/adhd-relationship-book/ 

 

 

Find me on all the socials!  

Instagram @erikamileytherapy  + @sextalkwitherikamiley
Twitter @sextalkwitherikamiley
Facebook.com/sextalkwitherikamiley
https://www.youtube.com/user/MrsErikaMiley
erikamiley.com 
erika@erikamiley.com  

If you like this episode and podcast, please consider leaving a rating and review on your favorite podcast app!

 

If you struggle with shame about your body, your sexuality, or need to process your personal life, I offer 1-on-1 Therapy. Click the button to the right for more info.

 

80. Cancer and Sex

During the month of October, it is breast cancer awareness month.  To spread awareness Erika talks with Brandie Sellers,  a Nationally Certified Counselor based in North Texas. 

She works with people around cancer and sexuality.  In addition to working with people deconstructing religion as well. 

Questions talked about: 

Would you be okay to tell us your story? 

What does cancer and sexuality have in common? 

What role do you believe shame plays for people who have been through a chronic illness and sex? 

What is common experience of individuals with medical professionals around sex after diagnosis? 

If someone is out there listening who is on this journey, what do you want them to know? 

Products referenced: 

https://sliquid.com/shop/ 

https://goodcleanlove.com 

 

BrandieDSellers@gmail.com 

@brandie.sellers on IG 

https://www.therapyden.com/therapist/brandie-sellers-allen-tx 

http://www.ichoosechange.com/brandie_sellers/ 

 

Find me on all the socials!  

Instagram @erikamileytherapy  + @sextalkwitherikamiley
Twitter @sextalkwitherikamiley
Facebook.com/sextalkwitherikamiley
https://www.youtube.com/user/MrsErikaMiley
erikamiley.com 
erika@erikamiley.com  

If you like this episode and podcast, please consider leaving a rating and review on your favorite podcast app!

 

If you struggle with shame about your body, your sexuality, or need to process your personal life, I offer 1-on-1 Therapy. Click the button to the right for more info.

 

79. Sex, Meditation, and Connection with the Male Body 

Our world create distance from our bodies, feelings, and relationships.  Mindfulness can allow a person to reconnect with themselves in so many facets in their lives.  Erika interviews Joe Molinari, Sex and Trauma Therapist in Minneapolis about how the male identified clients he sees can use mindfulness to reconnect to their sexuality, treat sexual dysfunction, and connect with their partners in ways they never anticipated.   

 

Joe is licensed in Colorado, Minnesota, sees clients online, and in person in his office in Minneapolis.  You can also find him here: 

Joemolinari.com 

 

Resources: 

https://insighttimer.com/ 

https://tricycle.org/magazine/meditation-app/ 

 

Find me on all the socials!  

Instagram @erikamileytherapy  + @sextalkwitherikamiley
Twitter @sextalkwitherikamiley
Facebook.com/sextalkwitherikamiley
https://www.youtube.com/user/MrsErikaMiley
erikamiley.com 
erika@erikamiley.com  

If you like this episode and podcast, please consider leaving a rating and review on your favorite podcast app!

 

If you struggle with shame about your body, your sexuality, or need to process your personal life, I offer 1-on-1 Therapy. Click the button to the right for more info.

 

78. Male Sexuality 

Sex and Relationship therapist Dr. Joe Kort and Erika tackle the myths and misconceptions around male sexuality.  They also tackle how it impacts relationships and the adversarial dynamics it can create.  Do not miss this episode that attempts to obliterate shame and encourages men to seek help!   

 

Questions asked: 

What would you say the biggest myth around male sexuality? 

 

Find Joe in these places in the world: 

www.joekort.com 

twitter @drjoekort 

facebook https://m.facebook.com/joekort/ 

joekort@joekort.com 

 

Shout outs to: 

https://modernsextherapyinstitutes.com/ 

Find me on all the socials!  

Instagram @erikamileytherapy  + @sextalkwitherikamiley
Twitter @sextalkwitherikamiley
Facebook.com/sextalkwitherikamiley
https://www.youtube.com/user/MrsErikaMiley
erikamiley.com 
erika@erikamiley.com  

If you like this episode and podcast, please consider leaving a rating and review on your favorite podcast app!

 

If you struggle with shame about your body, your sexuality, or need to process your personal life, I offer 1-on-1 Therapy. Click the button to the right for more info.

 

77. Becoming Cliterate

Female bodied people come to me all of time asking this very common question, “Why can’t I have an orgasm during sex?”  Then I’m usually asking them if sex to them means penetration.  They usually answer yes.  This episode is going to tackle the social, cultural, and physiological nature of the vulva!   

 

Dr. Laurie Mintz, teaches human sexuality at University of Florida, has private practice, and has written two books the Tired Women’s Guide to Passionate Sex, and today’s topic Becoming Cliterate.   

 

You can find Dr. Mintz here: 

https://www.drlauriemintz.com/ 

 

@drlauriemintz (insta and twitter)   

Find me on all the socials!  

Instagram @erikamileytherapy  + @sextalkwitherikamiley
Twitter @sextalkwitherikamiley
Facebook.com/sextalkwitherikamiley
https://www.youtube.com/user/MrsErikaMiley
erikamiley.com 
erika@erikamiley.com  

If you like this episode and podcast, please consider leaving a rating and review on your favorite podcast app!

 

If you struggle with shame about your body, your sexuality, or need to process your personal life, I offer 1-on-1 Therapy. Click the button to the right for more info.

 

76. Painful Sex

In this episode we are talking about painful sex, more specifically endometriosis and adenomyosis.   

Dr. Angie Stoehr, doctor, director of the non-profit the Pelvic and Intimate Pain Center, and author of the book When it Hurts Down There. 

 

We cover these questions: 

What are the most common causes of pelvic or sexual pain? 

What is endometriosis? 

 

What is adenomyosis?  What’s the difference? 

How do you know you have it? 

When should you go to the doctor?? 

 

Serves patients in Frisco TX, DFW metroplex and even south Oklahoma.   

Find here: 

http://whenithurtsdownthere.blogspot.com/ 

http://whenithurts.com/ 

Painfreenookie.com/apply 

972-406-9911 

 

Desert Harvest: 

https://www.desertharvest.com/Releveum/ 

  

Find me on all the socials!  

Instagram @erikamileytherapy  + @sextalkwitherikamiley
Twitter @sextalkwitherikamiley
Facebook.com/sextalkwitherikamiley
https://www.youtube.com/user/MrsErikaMiley
erikamiley.com 
erika@erikamiley.com  

If you like this episode and podcast, please consider leaving a rating and review on your favorite podcast app!

 

If you struggle with shame about your body, your sexuality, or need to process your personal life, I offer 1-on-1 Therapy. Click the button to the right for more info.

 

75. Sex and Nutrition 

Hey folks we're going to do something a little different I am recording this episode and streaming live on FB.  So I will be answering questions as we go today!  Woohoo!   

 

Today I'm tackling sex and nutrition which will include some talk about aphrodisiacs.   

First let's talk some foods that may actually make it more difficult to have sex!  Foods to avoid (not saying these are bad foods...) 

Cheese and Bread 🙁  I know this is probably a big bummer... lol.  The reasoning from nutritionists is these foods are hard for the body absorb generally and may cause bloating, cramping, and gas.  All of which are not super fun to deal with if you are trying to be physically intimate with others. Dr. Emily Nagoski's book Come As You Are gives us tons of evidence that context matters a whole lot for women folk to have sex.  So cramps, bloating, and gas are not the best for sexy contexts. 

The Standard American Diet generally, may be so detrimental to our cardiovascular health that sexual dysfunction, heart attacks, or strokes are often the result. Industrial pollutants such as PCBs found mostly in fish may lead to loss of libido, sexual dysfunction, and erectile dysfunction. The regular eating of calorie dense animal and processed foods may down-regulate dopamine receptors and result in a reduced neurological capacity to enjoy sex. Now that you've rolled your eyes 😉  let's talk about the good stuff. 
 

Here are some great food suggestions for increasing sexual health: 

Ground Flax Seeds (I put these on my oatmeal in the morning!) 

Omega 3 fatty acids-great for cardiovascular health (plus for libido!) 

L-arginine. This amino acid can boost blood flow and keep sperm healthy. 

Now I'm a plant based eater but here is one of those foods that has been called an aphrodisiac. 

Oysters 

This seafood is rich in zinc, a key mineral for sexual maturation. Zinc helps your body produce testosterone, a hormone linked with sexual desire. It also helps synthesize thyroid hormones, necessary for having energy. So don't expect immediate results but for overall sexual health those of you who do eat meat this food can increase sexual health. 

 

Strawberries 

No surprise here, they even look sexy!   

Encouraging of good circulation is thought to be crucial for sexual functioning in both men and women, and strawberries are rich in antioxidants that benefit your heart and arteries. 
 

What's more, they're rich in vitamin C, which along with antioxidants, has been linked to higher sperm counts in men. Try dipping the berries in dark chocolate, which contains methylxanthines that may activate the libido. 

 

Pumpkin Seeds 

Pumpkin seeds, like oysters, are packed with zinc. They’re also a great source of magnesium. They contain antioxidative, antihypertensive, and cardioprotective nutrients, all essential for optimal sexual health. 
 

The omega-3 fatty acids in pumpkin seeds may help with gynecological and prostate health. Omega-3s are known to reduce inflammation in the body. 

 

Pumpkin seeds are rich in: 

iron, necessary for feeling energized 

zinc, associated with boosting immunity 

magnesium, essential for relaxation 
 

Avocado!! (My favorite..I could eat this with almost every meal) 

Let’s start with a fun fact: The word for “avocado” is derived from an Aztec word meaning “testicle.” 
 

Avocados are really good for the testicles, or at least what comes out of them. Versatile and nourishing, avocados are loaded with vitamin E. Vitamin E is a key antioxidant that widens blood vessels, potentially lowering the risk for cardiovascular disease. It may also reduce sperm DNA damage. 

 

Avocados are also rich in: 

vitamin B-6, which helps keep your nervous system in balance 

potassium, which powers up your libido and energy 

monounsaturated oleic acid, which supports circulation and makes your heart healthy 
 

 

https://www.health.com/health/gallery/0,,20668823,00.html? 
 

https://www.healthline.com/health/food-nutrition/foods-for-better-sex#11  

 

Find me on all the socials!  

Instagram @erikamileytherapy  + @sextalkwitherikamiley
Twitter @sextalkwitherikamiley
Facebook.com/sextalkwitherikamiley
https://www.youtube.com/user/MrsErikaMiley
erikamiley.com 
erika@erikamiley.com  

If you like this episode and podcast, please consider leaving a rating and review on your favorite podcast app!

 

If you struggle with shame about your body, your sexuality, or need to process your personal life, I offer 1-on-1 Therapy. Click the button to the right for more info.

 

74. Erika’s Picks for Sexy Media

In this episode I wanted to have some fun and give you a sneak peek into my favorite media around the world of sexuality.  I’m thinking TV…I’m thinking movies.. I’m thinking some porn! 

 

Let’s tackle TV shows first!  Netflix, Hulu, Amazon Prime, and YouTube have opened up the world to all of us.  There is so much content out here!!  I know some of my listeners will probably think…oh you missed this one… hey let me know!  I would love to hear what you are watching!  Let me know via any of the socials!! 

 

Big Mouth- Netflix 

Bonding-Netflix 

Sex Education-Netflix 

Easy- Netflix 

One Day at a Time- Netflix 

Bob’s Burger’s-Hulu/Fox 

Sabrina the Teenage Witch-Netflix 

Pose -FX 

Jane the Virgin- CW/Netflix 

 

Movies 

Die Another Day- Hulu Let’s be real Halle Barry/Pierce Brosnan 

Thomas Crown Affair 1999 Rene Russo/Pierce Brosnan 

Someone Great- Netflix Lots of amazing people and great kissing from everyone. 

 

Porn 

Hump! Film Festival- touring short dirty movies humpfilmfest.com to see if the tour is coming near you. 

ErikaLust.com Lust Cinema 

The Crash Pad 

The Good Vibrations video on demand 

 

Find me on all the socials!  

Instagram @erikamileytherapy  + @sextalkwitherikamiley
Twitter @sextalkwitherikamiley
Facebook.com/sextalkwitherikamiley
https://www.youtube.com/user/MrsErikaMiley
erikamiley.com 
erika@erikamiley.com  

If you like this episode and podcast, please consider leaving a rating and review on your favorite podcast app!

 

If you struggle with shame about your body, your sexuality, or need to process your personal life, I offer 1-on-1 Therapy. Click the button to the right for more info.